Violet's Dedication

This past Sunday we had Violet dedicated at our church. It's such a special moment in our parenting journey, because it's the point at which we corporately declare that this child is not our own, but God's. And we promise to steward her well throughout her childhood journey so that she grows up to know who she is and to know Jesus' love for her. And there's something powerful in such a corporate acknowledgement.

I love that our pastor walks her around the church for everyone to see. So often, we're scrambling in to the service late and rushing out to get home for naps that I feel like we miss seeing so many sweet faces. And the fact that our congregation also promises to help steward Violet and show her Jesus' love is so powerful and meaningful. Because raising a child takes so many more people and prayers than our own. There are so many influences on our children throughout their journey. Wouldn't it be amazing if each person loved your child and spoke hope, love and destiny over them at each meeting?!

There's Something I Have To Tell You

And no, I'm not pregnant. Promise! {In my family, that's usually the first guess when someone of childbearing age/station begins a sentence that way}

photo credit Ken Bruggeman

Seriously, though, I've been holding out on you. I haven't yet told you the whole story. Fear held me back. But now, fear has to go. And faith must endure.

Over three years ago, God started speaking to Ben's heart and my heart separately. But He was telling us both the same things. Things about our destiny and our future. And then we'd be talking about the things on our hearts, sharing our dreams and desires, and we'd realize that suddenly we were both desiring the same things, dreaming about the same destiny--our futures looked identical--and all of it was new. None of it was familiar. We had been married over a year at that point and none of this had ever come up in conversation.

photo via

Except that I can remember {periodically throughout my life} emphatically declaring: I will NEVER live on a farm. I will NEVER be a farmer's wife.

photo via

But suddenly, my heart yearned for nothing else. Suddenly, the only future I could see involved my family living, working, loving and worshipping in fields and meadows. I could only see a way of life that involved raising animals for meat, dairy, and eggs the way they were intended to be raised--sustainably, on grass. Cows. Pigs. Chickens. And this was all that my husband could see as well. {My husband, who once turned his nose up at the thought of attending an agricultural college because "it stinks!"}

photo via

You see, God laid this destiny on our hearts and from it grew up the desires of our hearts. Three years later, we are at the point where we can no longer decipher between destiny and desire, because they're the same. And it's wonderful.

photo via

There's only one problem. We don't own a farm. We don't have family that owns a farm. And we don't have the finances to afford a farm. Not even a small farmette. Nope. Nothing. But here's the thing--the thing I've been keeping from you--we don't see that as a problem. Because God has promised to provide us with a farm. Three years ago, when He started working on our hearts, He told us that He's prepared a place for us. And He would provide us with a farm.

Now, even with a promise like that, it's hard to imagine it really happening. Circumstances say it won't happen. Natural realities say that it won't happen. And I'm not here preaching some prosperity gospel, but guys--it's going to happen! I've been afraid to tell you this because what if it doesn't happen. But that silly fear is not from my God and lately I've been so burdened by the need to share my story even before it's complete.

photo via

So here it is. We believe that God is going to give us a farm. It's okay to be skeptical and doubtful. Most of the people we've told this to react that way. And we understand. It doesn't make sense. No one has ever seen something like this happen. And you haven't received my promise because it's mine. But we're standing in faith, believing that soon we will be living on a farm, restoring the land and really beginning our journey toward living life as it was intended. Because either God is God or He's not. And we've come to know Him too well {or else we're just too stubborn to admit otherwise} to believe that He doesn't exist and that the things He says are not true.

I know this post is long, but I'd like to share our friends' story. It's a story I was expectantly waiting to hear. And I think you'll be amazed too!

{copied from his Facebook page}:

I've been waiting to release this testimony, but now is the time. As most of you know, my wife and I had been trusting God to provide a minivan for our family the moment we realized our family was growing from 4 to 6. We became a one vehicle family in November 2012 and have watched God provide for our needs through people literally giving us full use of their cars for 3 months at a time. When the twins were born on August 10th, I was caught off guard. The van had not come yet. It certainly wasn't how I planned for it to go down. I thought for sure that the van would precede the twins birth. Three days after the twins were born, I received an email from a woman who had heard me preach a few weeks ago. During the sermon, God put it on her heart that she and her husband were to buy us a minivan. The picture you see is that van. Last Wednesday, the very next day after her email, this couple took me to Performance Toyota in Sinking Spring and wrote a check for $27,500 for a 2012 Toyota Sienna LE with only 10,000 miles on it.
It has always been my desire to see the fruit of what I claim I believe and for everyone who knows me to see the salvation of God in my life. During this whole time, one verse rang out in my heart: "He knows what I need before I ask." And He knew I needed a van. God is good. God is faithful.

Thanks for your prayers!

xoxo,
Tabitha

My Only Fear

Truth be told, I have only one fear in this life: that my children might lose sight of who they are. I'm not afraid of sickness, germs, or even death. I'm not afraid they'll make bad decisions or injure themselves in one way or another.  Because all of those things are bound to happen at one point or another and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. But losing sight of their identity does not have to be an inevitability. And I can do everything about it.

I can help them to know deep down in their souls that they are not their bad behavior. They simply made a bad choice. They are not someone's opinion of them. They are beautiful, strong and uniquely crafted individuals. They are not worthless. They are so incredibly worthy. {Jesus died for them!!} They are not lost or hopeless, for there is nothing too dirty and no crime unforgivable. They are not shameful, disgraceful or judged. They are free, redeemed and loved beyond imagination.

They are loved beyond imagination!! 

In the sobering reflection that follows the loss of a beautiful life cut short by its own will, my heart breaks to know that so many people believe the lies that others have spoken over them. That their perception of reality has so far strayed from actual reality that it is incomprehensible to anyone close to them. That they have let the opinions of others tell them who they are and that they hate this person others have created them to be. That they have lost sight of who they are. They have lost sight of their identity.

But I have the opportunity to foster my children's identities. To steward their identities. It's something I need to remind myself of daily, because in the moment of bad behavior it is so easy to equate the behavior with the child. {I wish I could take back the times I've told Burke he was a bad boy...} The truth is that he is a good boy who made a bad choice and the consequence must flow from that reality. His heart is so sweet and loving. He has such a generous and precious spirit. He is gentle and thoughtful. And these are the things I speak over him daily so that one day, if confronted with a contradictory perception, he'll know the truth about himself. He'll know who he is. His actions are a reflection of his perception of himself. So if he believes that he is loved, gentle and kind then he will act  in those ways. But if he believes that he is unloved and hopeless, then he will embark on a destructive path. So I pray that he'll be able to remove the lenses of contradictory perception that try to distort his view and leave him feeling hopeless and unloved. Because nothing scares me more than imagining my child believing the lie that he or she is alone, unloved, unworthy.

So I pray every day that I will be love to my children. To everyone around me. That I will speak identity and life over them and not death. I pray that they always know who they are. That they are loved beyond imagination.

Sitting In Stillness

When words fail... When the cacophony of my head, heart and soul deafens me... When there is utter chaos inside and no way to explain...

When a thousand fleeting thoughts flash through my mind but so quickly my mind can't finish the thought or process its meaning... When my heart feels so many things that the expression of even one is impossible... When my soul's deepest desires well up from inside and long to find rest...

When I go to pray and nothing comes out...

the Lord knows the thoughts of man, that they are a mere breath {ps. 94:11}

delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart {ps. 37:4}

Then I sit in stillness. And breathe. And without words or even one coherent thought, I let the jarring symphony of my heart, mind and soul swell to its peak and decrescendo to an anticlimactic finish. And then there is silence. And then there is peace.

Because He Lives {Printable Easter Bag Topper}

Easter is right around the corner. First there's Spring. {WOO HOO} Then there's Easter. It feels like it gets earlier each year. And besides being beyond excited for warmer weather and a big and tasty Easter dinner, you know what these two things have in common for me?

Hope. 

There's just something about sunshine and warm temperatures that make my heart overflow with hope and fill my heart with joy. I can face the future and all of its uncertainties without thought. I can take my children outside and enjoy the fresh scent of the Springtime air. Nothing is wrong with the world when my ears are filled with the lyrical notes of their laughter and coos. We can celebrate the wonder of new life: baby animals, baby buds. No doubt about it, Springtime is magical.

And hope of salvation. A hope that fills my heart with an endless and unfathomable love. A love that is greater than me. That tells me I'm beautiful. Perfect. Worthy. Even when I fail. When I'm a hopeless mess. My Daddy sees me as He created me. He doesn't see me the way I do. And there is no greater hope than this.

So as you celebrate the glories of Spring and feast around the Easter table, I wish you a heart full of hope. I pray that you too believe that life is worth living simply because He lives.

{Since my heart-shaped lotion bars were such a hit on Valentine's Day, I decided to make Easter-themed lotion bars for friends and family. Feel free to use my "because he lives" bag toppers for your Easter treats. Click here to download.}